Small Kindnesses

I heard a poem today called “Small Kindnesses” by Devin Lynae, and it really made a powerful impression. If you get a chance to listen to it, please do. I promise, it’s beautiful.

This poem is about showing small kindnesses to your horse. The things asked for in the poem are things we should be doing for our horses anyway (without being asked), but so often I see them neglected.  I have to wonder if those who neglect these small kindnesses aren’t the same people who consider horses to be things or mere possessions rather than living, breathing, sentient partners. So, I am going to go over some of these small kindnesses listed in Lynae’s lovely poem, and discuss them just a little. Hopefully I can refrain from descending into lecture mode.

Lynae’s poem begins by asking that we not “take him up the mountain if he ain’t been rode in weeks.” If you wouldn’t make yourself, your significant other, kids, friends, etc. to do it, don’t ask it of your horse. He may be immensely more powerful than you, but he is still subject to the laws of entropy and needs to be in shape before he can be safely asked to “go up the mountain.” We all know what it feels like to wake up the morning after a hectic day and feel like we were run over by a truck. Why wouldn’t we recognize that our horse is made of the same flesh, blood, bone, muscles, tendons, ligaments, and lactic acid (which causes sore muscles) that we are, and therefore is subject to the same laws of physical pain? We can whine and ask our significant other to bring us a couple aspirins to help with the pain. We can voluntarily go to the doctor if we need. A horse bears his pain without complaint, and even when it does show in slowed movements, slight depression, or faint lameness, we often don’t notice and do nothing to help the poor horse.

Another line asks that we “let the bit fall slowly when we drop it from his lips.” I don’t know how many times I’ve seen a person rip the bridle off and bang the horses’ teeth, or even torque it so that it’s caught around his lower jaw and he couldn’t spit it out to save his life. Take care when unbridling (or bridling) that you aren’t hurting the horse. This includes warming the bit on cold days before you put it in his mouth.

Toward the end of the poem, Lynae reminds us to remember that “he doesn’t hurt you, even though if he wanted to, he could.” This may go without saying, but no horse is going to see you a mile away and chase you down just to hurt you. His first choice is going to be to avoid you if he can. The only time he’s going to hurt you is if he feels that is the only way out and you’re totally ignoring his signals that he feels threatened.

Horses that are our partners and have learned to put up with our… stuff… rarely do anything that might hurt us, even though they could. In exchange for this kindness from them, we owe them many small kindnesses throughout the day. Every day. Without fail. Show small kindnesses daily to your horse and your horse will reward you with the kind of friendship and loyalty most people only dream of.